Anonymous Confession #713: “I liked Bella in the first book. But by the end of the series I hated her. I wished that both Jacob and Edward would have dumped her.”
Anonymous Confession #707: “I’m embarassed that I ever liked Twilight. When people ask me if I’ve ever read the books, I lie and say no.”
Anonymous Confession #706: “My favorite moment in BD (the book) was when Leah bitched out Bella and made her cry. She had it coming for four books.”
Anonymous Confession #685: “Whatever cocaine surely must have been lining the pages of my Twilight books must be all gone now. Because when I open those books, I can’t believe I ever liked them.”
The Twilight movies > the Twilight books
Twilight started out as Stephenie Meyer’s wet dream about Joseph Smith with glitter on his face Edward Cullen and I think she intentionally wrote it in a way that would replicate that experience for the reader. The immersion in the fantasy is stronger (for some) but the quality of the writing suffers. Bella is a Mary Sue character who is left intentionally undeveloped so the reader is able to project themselves into the story. If you’ve no interest in fantasizing about being in Bella’s shoes, the book isn’t going to be very enjoyable. That’s why so many people hate it. I never became ‘lost’ in the Twilight books the way I am with other books. I wasn’t able to identify with Bella at all, nor could I imagine myself behaving the way she behaved. I found myself wishing that Edward Cullen had been the protagonist, or that the books had been written in 3rd person or that the side characters were actually developed rather than making them empty pawns who exist to serve Bella’s needs in the story. If you were able to enjoy the books as intended, that’s fine. It doesn’t make you stupid or a bad person. I didn’t enjoy reading the Twilight books at all. It felt like doing a chore. I was told countless times that 1. I had no right to criticize The Twilight Saga if I hadn’t read all the books and 2. the books are so much better than the movies. Well, I read them and they aren’t, sorry.
The main reason I believe the Twilight movies are far better than the books is that we’re not forced to see everything through Bella’s eyes. The movies are also fun to watch (particularly with Rifftrax). The melodrama makes them unintentionally hilarious (like a bad telenovela), most of the cast are really easy on the eyes and the locations are nice to look at. Of course they’re bad movies, but they’re not supposed to be life-changing or high culture. Do I like intelligent films? Of course, but I’m not always in the mood for that. Sometimes I just want to grab some popcorn and watch something really dumb and entertaining. The Twilight movies deliver that. They serve their purpose, they successfully bring to life a bad book series and make it more tolerable.
I can’t believe someone actually wants to read sex scenes penned by Stephenie Meyer. I couldn’t disagree more. I am forever grateful she didn’t even attempt it. That’s what fanfic is for.
Anonymous Confession #217: “More than the poorly-drawn characters, abysmal writing, or spineless plotting, Stephenie Meyer’s greatest sin was the wedding night fade-to-black. I slogged through thousands of pages for no sex scene? This, I cannot forgive.”
missmary85 asked: Hi, I really like your blog. I read the four books, in spanish because it's my language... anyway, maybe something loses with translation or maybe I'm dummy, hahaha But I prefer "Eclipse" more than "Breaking Dawn" and "New moon". Changing the subject (Just a little anecdote) I have a friend and he is psychologist, he trys to explain Twilight with a lot of Jungian psychoanalysis... I just told him: "Meyer is mormon" hahaha and He says: "Oh boy!!! has more sense!!!". LOL xoxo
Breaking Dawn was… I don’t know how to describe it besides “WTF?” I hated creepy Renesmee, I wished Aro had killed her. I hated the visiting vampires who seemed more like mutants from X-Men. I’m fine with vampires being sparkly, I’m even ok with them making babies. But I’m sorry: vampires cannot control the fucking weather. I have to draw the line somewhere.
I hated babysitter Jacob. I hated how the rest of the Cullens lost their personalities. It’s like they all became slaves to Bella and Renesmee. Rosalie loves Bella now just because she has a baby? That’s bullshit. I really hated vampire Bella. I hated how nothing happened. In the end the whole story is pointless and Bella is still a self-centered stupid cow. Stephenie Meyer never takes risks, she never does anything interesting with her characters. Nobody important dies. She has absolutely no balls whatsoever as a writer. This book was a shitty attempt at fanservice. She was trying to make it end so perfectly and give the fans what she thought they wanted, but she ended up with a pile of crap. I just hated the way she ended the story. It sucked.
