Anonymous Confession #127: “The only characters in The Twilight Saga that are interesting are Jasper, Carlisle, Alice and Charlie.”
Anonymous Confession #093: “I only watch the Twilight saga for Jasper, Emmett and Charlie.”
Anonymous Confession #057: “I think Charlie was growing pot out in the woods.”
re: reading New Moon/Eclipse
“I don’t think you should dump all your other friends for your boyfriend, Bella. It’s not nice, and I think your life would be better balanced if you kept some other people in it. What happened last September, well, if you’d had more of a life outside of Edward Cullen, it might not have been like that.” - Charlie Swan
Moustache Dad is wise indeed. We salute you, Moustache Dad! You are the only character in these books with any sense whatsoever. God Bless you, Moustache Dad.
Fuck Yeah Team Moustache Dad
No Stache - Breaking Dawn commentary with director Bill Condon
I prefer him with the moustache. Billy Burke is a good looking guy, but with that moustache he is a sexy beast.
At the end of BD2 Charlie will end up with Sue Clearwater, but I don’t buy it. Charlie would not date his friend’s widow, he would find it too awkward. I ship Charlie Swan with Cora. She bakes berry cobbler for him every Thursday and they reminisce about Butt-crack Santa.
Anonymous asked: is anyone not bi or gay in twilight?
Charlie Swan is heterosexual.
Your alibi for the battle is all arranged.
If Bella was over 18 years old in ‘Eclipse’, why did she need an alibi for the battle? Couldn’t she just tell Charlie, “Hey Dad, I’m sleeping over at Edward’s tonight.”? If it was me, my dad would have been like, “Whatever.” My mom would have given me $20 to go buy a box of condoms and my brother would have said something snarky like “Get the extra extra small size.”
Charlie is laid back to the point of being a pretty bad parent, you’d think he would be OK with her spending the night with her boyfriend. Perhaps he doesn’t know the true extent of the shit Bella and Edward have been through but he at least understands they’re in a long term relationship. He already thinks they’re having sex anyway. Are most parents that strict with their adult children? Does Bella just enjoy lying to her father because she’s a bitch? LOL
